ClosedI’ve started my very own Review Blog! It’s pretty snazzy, if I do say so myself. And I do. Frequently.
Come check me out!
Filed under: reviews
ClosedI wanted to thank all the commenters on yesterday’s post. You really gave me some ideas to think on and to talk to Gerald about. Things I hadn’t even thought of like keeping in touch with teachers! And gifted programs! And there’s no way in hell you’ll survive being home with your kids 24/7, you moron!
Seriously, though, I really appreciate the feedback. Sometimes this internet thingamahjig sure is handy, amirite?
Filed under: uncategorized
Disclaimer: I’m not trying to be doocey douchey and all “My kid can read! Did I mention my kid can read? Books with chapters!” This is something Gerald and I are dealing with and y’all know how I love to share.
So, Maddie’s smart. Like, wicked smart. Like “the pediatrician labeled her a genius” and “her preschool director called me and asked permission to move her up a class this fall” smart. This is no surprise to us, of course. When she was younger, we’d see her do or hear her say something and look at each other and wonder “do other kids her age do/say this kind of stuff?” As we became better acquainted with kids her age, we realized the answer was “no.” Don’t get me wrong; she’s not some kind of scary prodigy that’s destined to graduate Cornell at the age of 14. However, she’s smart enough that we need to have a game plan on how to handle it, y’know?
First of all, we’ve decided not to tell her that she’s wicked smart. Who needs that kind of pressure? Instead, when she’s tried to do something, regardless of whether she succeeds or fails, we applaud the effort she gave. When I was still pregnant with her we read a study that said that linking praise to success can lead to kids feeling like a complete failure if they don’t succeed. That the only good outcome is winning. I don’t care if she comes home with a D- in Algebra if a D- is the best she can do. If she sweat for that D-, then it’s as good as an A to me. If she’s lazy and doesn’t apply herself and still gets a B-, then I’m not as thrilled. So, we focus on the effort she extends, not the outcome.
We also try to strike that precious balance between providing opportunities for her to learn vs. ramming it down her throat. For example, she’s *this close* to reading and I credit it to starfall.com. We started going through the alphabet on the site with her about a year and a half ago, maybe two years. And not for any other reason than it entertained her. She loves to sit in our laps with the MacBook and surf the ‘net. We figured we ought to balance out the kitty videos on YouTube with something vaguely educational. She ended up preferring starfall to anything else. Honestly, her being able to read this early is completely an accident on our part.
Now that we realize what we’re working with as far as her potential is concerned, things seem a little more daunting. Gerald and I were both gifted as kids and completely squandered it, albeit for different reasons. I was lazy and HATED homework so I never did it. I barely graduated high school despite scoring insanely high on ACT. (That score was the only reason I was accepted into college.) Gerald, on the other hand, was misdiagnosed as learning disabled and wasn’t given the chance to prove otherwise until high school. By then, he was so disillusioned with the entire academic world that he blew off college entirely. (Ironically, he now works for one of the best universities in the country.) We both desperately want to avoid these situations with Maddie. We don’t want to send her to public school for two main reasons: 1. The public school system in Texas SUCKS ASS. Seriously, we’re at the bottom of the barrel. 2. The possibility that she’ll fall through the cracks is astronomical. Teachers are spread too thin, paid too little and expected to do too much to be able to pay attention to each of their students and their respective potential. This, of course, leaves us with two options: We can send her to private school and hope that the smaller class size equals more one-on-one attention, or we can homeschool her.
Currently, the state of Texas doesn’t require any sort of registration or certification to homeschool a child. It’s easy to get into and there are plenty of co-ops in our area so the issue of social development is moot. My big concern is that I’m simply not smart enough to keep up with her. I can get her through college-level reading and science, but math? Not so much. I am completely, hopelessly, embarrassingly bad at math. (This is because I tend to think logarithmically and not by integers, but whatev.) How am I supposed to teach her shit I can’t do? Also, will I go batshit crazy being around her and Sam 24/7? (Answer: YES.)
I guess it’s time to figure it all out. She’s in the kindergarten prep preschool class this year so we need to have a plan in place for next year. I swear, these kids are going to be the death of me. If it’s not “feed me! entertain me! provide shelter!” it’s “educate me!” and “help me live up to my potential without becoming That Kind of Parent!”
Filed under: maddie
I’ve been wanting to blog for over a week now and just can’t seem to get any time to do so. Sam’s in this horribly needy/clingy/screechy stage. He’s an absolute gem when he’s being held. Gerald actually calls him “Guy Smiley.” However, the MINUTE you set his ass down, it’s DEFCON 1/Red Alert/Death is Imminent. He hates the swing, the bouncy seat, the playmat… basically everything that’s not Mama or Daddy. I’m not going to candy coat it. It’s a pain in the ass. I struggle with getting the bare minimum done everyday. Even wearing him in the Moby Wrap or Baby Bjorn I’m limited as to what I can do. Some things just aren’t possible to accomplish when wearing a baby.
Anyhow, Maddie’s eating breakfast and watching Curious George and Sam’s still in bed, so I’m going to write until one of them loses their respective shit.
* Maddie’s completely potty trained (during the day). It was a rough four or five days, but we made it through and my girl’s been a champ. If only we could stop the Tour of All Public Restrooms We Encounter, things would be perfect.
* Speaking of, I think this is the ideal time to teach Mad about “private parts.” At church the other night, she started pulling her shorts and underpants down in the hallway outside of the bathroom. Right now, she has no concept of private parts. Hers or mine or Dad’s or Sam’s. We’ve always been very matter of fact about genitalia and treat it like, say, an elbow, when bathing. I want to inspire modesty not shame and I’m unsure of how to go about it. Do any of you have any advice on the matter?
* It’s been 2 years since my gastric bypass. Even with a pregnancy in there, I’ve maintained my weight loss. I’ve lost 145lbs from my starting weight right before surgery and 160lbs from my heaviest. I’d like to lose 20 more pounds, but I’m not stressing about it. I wear a size 12 and a medium and I’m happy with that. I do, however, HATE myself naked. The extra skin! The shar pei wrinkles! The boobs that can be tucked into my waistband! It’s nothing that $40k worth of plastic surgery can’t fix and I look all right in clothes, so I guess it’s not so bad. I need to have Gerald take pictures and I’ll post comparative shots.
* BlogHer ’10 is next weekend and I’m not going. I’ve known for almost a year that I wouldn’t be attending and it’s still upsetting. I had such a wonderful time last year and it makes me heartsick to know that I’ll be missing it this year. And New York City! I’ve never been! I’m trying to be happy for my besties that are going, but it’s hard not to feel sorry for myself. I keep telling myself that while I can’t afford to go to BlogHer, I get to stay home with my kids instead of working 40 hours a week and sending them to daycare. Although, that’s hardly a plus some days, amirite?
Well, I’m halfway through my list of topics and Maddie desperately needs me to pretend to be The Man with the Yellow Hat. I got further than I thought I would.
Filed under: Sam, maddie, where do I come up with this stuff?
Last night while Maddie was at vacation bible school, I took Sam to the grocery store with me. It was an unmitigated disaster. There I was, trying to shop, and he just would. not. stop. I mean, it went on and on through the entire store. I finally had to stop in the pop aisle and give him a stern talking to. I simply will not tolerate this sort of thing.
Here’s photographic evidence of the atrocious behavior:
Seriously, how in the world was I supposed to pay any attention to getting groceries with that right in my face? The nerve of some kids, amirite?
Filed under: Sam, complaining, where do I come up with this stuff?
Dear Sam-a-lama Ding Dong:
You turned two whole months old yesterday. Where in the world has the time gone? It seems like only yesterday that I was raging against the hospital for putting you in the NICU and counting the minutes until I could bring you home.
You’ve changed so very much over the last two months. First of all, there’s this:
Look at those porkchops! nom nom nom
And this:
arm rolls!
And this:
chin rolls!
You’ve gone from 6 lbs 6 oz at 11 days old to 11.6 lbs today. ELEVEN POUNDS. You are a roly poly, my boy. I’m not surprised, mind you. Seeing as I’m the one who’s stuffing a bottle in your scream-hole every two hours. Seriously, can we start to increase the time between feedings? Please??
I’m completely in love with you. Your little smiles and coos just about kill me. But my absolute favorite is the sound you make after every sneeze. You sort of start to sneeze again but just say “aaahhhh!” instead. It’s unbelievably adorable. You love: kisses on your chubby neck, your hair washed and riding in the Moby Wrap. You hate: cold wipes during diaper changes, not being held 24 hours a day and having your nails trimmed.
When I took you to the pediatrician yesterday, we discovered that you have a mild umbilical hernia and a case of thrush. Apparently, the hernia will resolve itself by the time you’re a year old, so that’s good news. And some anti-fungal junk will clear up the thrush. In any case, you’ve got your sister beat. She’d already had ear infections by now. Way to wreck the curve.
I know that life as the second kid won’t always be a bed of roses. Already we take less pictures of you than we did of Maddie at this age and I don’t stress over every little thing like I did with Maddie. Things are much more laid back with you. But, none of these things are indicators of our love for you. We love you every bit as much as we love your sister. It’s just that time has become a precious commodity and I’d rather spend it kissing that warm, soft neck of yours than snapping your picture or fretting about your sleep schedule.
I love you as big as the sky,
Mama
Filed under: Sam
Today, I forced my daughter to wear underpants.
I know that all the “experts” say not to rush potty training and to let your kid decide when they’re ready, but my kid doesn’t fit the mold. She’s completely able to use the potty. As a matter of fact, she’s done it quite a few times in the past. She likes the convenience of diapers and, frankly, she’s lazy. She also uses the whole potty training situation as a chance to exert control.
She’s at the top end of the weight limit for size 4 diapers, so I told her that she’s gotten too big for her diapers and that’s as big as they get. We’ve been talking for weeks about this and that she’s going to have to start using the potty and wearing her underpants.
So far this morning we have 100% success. And by that, I mean she was happy to wear her underpants and hasn’t had an accident yet. She also hasn’t gone to the bathroom, either, so take that with a grain of salt.
I guess this goes to show that the expert opinion is usually right for most kids, but sometimes you just have to do what you think is right for your kid.
Filed under: maddie
So, what are your plans for the holiday weekend? I plan on cursing my emeffing neighbors who shoot off (illegal) fireworks in their yard, thus waking up my kids and terrifying my dog.
Although the above is actually true, it’s not all we’re doing this weekend. Tomorrow afternoon/evening, my dad and his wife are hosting a BBQ at their place. The kids and I will be going but Gerald has to stay home to work on a HUGE! project that he wants to have done by Tuesday. Then, we’re heading over to my dad’s church parking lot to watch the fireworks. (The parking lot happens to be across the street from the place where his town launches their fireworks. It’s the primo spot to be. Score!)
Sunday is Sam’s baptism; again at my dad’s church. Since all our 4th hullabaloo is on Saturday, we’re free for the rest of the day and all day Monday. Nothing too exciting, but plenty of fun.
How ’bout you? What are your plans for this festive of weekends?
Like millions of other stay-at-home moms, I can’t help but continually run the pros and cons in my head. If I went back to work, how much would I have to make in order to have a profit above and beyond paying for two kids in daycare? Would my kids benefit from being around other kids more often or would I essentially letting someone else raise my kids for me? There’d be no time for fun stuff on the weekends because I’d have to get all my errands done then. But, there’d be MONEY with which to do fun things if we had time to do them!
Yesterday, I talked to a good friend/old boss and she told me that my old workplace was going through a huge change and they were going to need someone with my specific licenses and experience. She said if I was interested in coming back to let her know and she’d talk to whomever. I’ve been thinking about it non-stop since then. I vacillate between believing that my kids are better off without material things and with my presence in their lives, and being so tired of being surrounded by tiny dictators and broke. I guess we’re never fully satisfied with what we’ve got, are we?
Filed under: complaining, sahm
