Still Alive. Barely.

In case you haven’t noticed, I’m in a “meh, I’ll blog some other time” phase right now. Twitter updates are more my speed these days.

1. Operation: No More Babies. I had the Essure procedure done on 12/22. The procedure itself was a cake walk. Two hours before, I had to take a Zofran and a Valium. At the appointment, I had to take off my pants and lay down. The end. Seriously, there was nothing to it. I had IV sedation and the procedure was done in a room at my doctor’s office. I woke up 45 minutes later and went home 10 minutes after that. No side effects, no problems whatsoever. In three months I’ll go back for an HSG test to confirm whether or not the ol’ tubes are blocked and then that’s it. Done and done. If you’re thinking about permanent measures of birth control, I can recommend Essure at this point. I’ll report again in three months, of course.

(An aside: I shared this on twitter, but here it is for you, in case you don’t follow me. You really should, you know. Anyhow, the co-director of Maddie’s preschool is the one who told me about Essure when she had it done seven months ago. When the kids went back to school after Christmas break, several teachers asked me if I’d talked to Stephanie yet. I hadn’t, and got Nervous Tummy about it. What in the world could she have to talk to me about that warranted this? Was I in trouble? OMG, I was getting sent to the preschool principal’s office! What she had to tell me was that she was pregnant. Apparently, her insurance company didn’t cover the HSG test after the Essure procedure, so she didn’t have it done. Her doctor said it was no problem, because she’d never heard of it not working. HA HA. She is now pregnant with their SIXTH child. Apparently, one of her fallopian tubes didn’t close all the way and her determined little egg made it’s way through to the Promised Land. After confirming that it wasn’t an ectopic pregnancy, all was declared well and she’s nine weeks along. So, her stupid insurance company that wouldn’t cover the HSG test is now going to have to pay for another pregnancy, birth and subsequent hysterectomy. She has a family history of ovarian cancer, so they’ve decided to just clean out her lady parts altogether. BUT!!! Don’t let this put you off the Essure business. It really is like one in a million that this happened.)

2. I had to go on birth control pills for these three months while the Essure does its magic and I had quite the adverse reaction to them. So, I took them for a week, freaked out, stopped them and got my period a week later. That’s a lot of hormones over the course of two weeks. I have not been the most pleasant person to be around.

3. It’s almost Madie’s fifth birthday and I have made no plans whatsoever.

4. Sam got bronchitis over Christmas and ended up on nebulizer treatments again. This time, he was on Albuterol and Pulmicort and holy moly, was it awful. The combination made him act demon-possessed. He had wild mood swings, manic behavior and threw honest-to-god temper tantrums that lasted FOREVER. He was completely inconsolable and I was completely out of patience. I talked to the doctor yesterday and he’s off the treatments, so hopefully his behavior will even back out over the next couple of days.

5. I’ve been spending some time out of The Boot. My ribs are fine. The hole in the garage ceiling is fixed. The shame from falling through the ceiling lingers.

Christmas Card Exchange?

Would you like to exchange Christmas cards this year? Really? Me, too!

So, leave me a comment and I’ll email you the pertinent info. And even if we’ve done this before, still let me know. I can’t be expected to remember these things. Sheesh.

Design on Zero Dimes

Being a one and a half income family of four, there’s not much money left over for things like decorating the house. And by not much, I mean ZERO MONIES are available for decorating the house. I’ll admit, before I had kids, I was house proud. I loved decorating and redecorating. I was on a first name basis with the staff at Pier One and Pottery Barn. Nowadays, I settle for a clean(ish) house that has all toys put away every night at bedtime. (Only to be up to my knees in toys by 8:00 am the next morning, of course. But while we’re all asleep? It looks FABULOUS.)

Lately, I’ve been craving a change so I took a look around and repurposed some of our existing decor and used some things that were just sitting around. I was able to change both kids’ rooms and their bathroom without spending a single penny out of pocket. The only thing that cost me imaginary money was the ink and paper I used to print some pictures. I was lucky to stumble across Indie Fixx’s Feed Your Soul Art Project and I printed out some for Sam and let Maddie choose her own. My decorating style used to be pretty matchy (but not matchy-matchy) but for Maddie’s room, I let her pick just about everything, decor-wise. I picked the furniture, but just about every other aspect is her choice. So, you’ll notice the pictures don’t match each other or follow a cohesive theme, but we’re cool with that. We love them and that’s all that counts.

Don’t pretend you don’t want to see pictures, Gladys Kravitz.

The kids’ bathroom was already decorated with Swell linens so it was bright and cheery. I found some wall decals in Maddie’s closet that I had gotten from Ikea to match her toddler bedding and they matched perfectly with our colors. Maddie helped choose the location for all the stickers and both kids really like it.

This is Maddie's favorite part

These are water animals, so they have to be by the bathtub, according to Maddie.

Sam’s room used to be decorated in Classic Winnie the Pooh, but he’s too old for that business. Since I don’t want to put too much time and money into decorating his room until he’s old enough to tell me what he likes, I just did the bare minimum to make me happy.

I made letters for Maddie when she was a baby, so of course, Sam got them, too.

I ended up moving the duck picture right underneath the birds on swings. It helps Sam stay stil long enough for a diaper change.

Over the crib, but high enough to avoid grabby hands.

Over the love seat.

Sam loves ducks and while coloring with Maddie, she asked for me to color her a picture to hang in her room. Sam got one too.

Maddie’s room:

Here's Maddie's coloring page. All colors were requested.

These letters used to be green apple green, but Maddie requested that they be pink, so I repainted them.

Happy Thoughts

* The job search is still going well.

* I had to call the IRS today and it wasn’t painful AT ALL. The rep was even FUNNY. And I also got that glorious feeling of relief to have An Issue be over and done with forever and ever, amen.

* The Blathering is coming up. Well, not exactly “soon” but “soonish” and I’m going to get to see so many awesome people. And hug them and make them wicked uncomfortable because “who is this stranger and why is she hugging me?!”

* I wrote, and sent, a difficult apology email and the recipient was very gracious in her reply.

* We’re not going to Cleveland this summer. This, in and of itself, is NOT a happy thought. This is a downright terrible thought and makes me very, very sad. BUT, not having to worry and agonize over the logistics is a happy byproduct.

* Since we’re not taking a big summer vacation, we’re going to try and take Maddie to the Gulf Coast for her first trip to the ocean. Sam’s still a little young, so he’ll probably get some alone time with Grandma and Grandpa.

* The combination of my increased antidepressant dosage and my self-help book seems to be doing me some good. I don’t feel bleak or hopeless or “emotionally botoxed” anymore. I feel, well, good, actually. This is the happiest thought of all.

Tidbits that don’t require their own post

* I’ve got my semi-annual breast cancer screening on Monday. Not only is it that time of year, but I’m also having a boob issue. Of course, there is a 99.9% chance that it’s absolutely nothing, but if you wouldn’t mind throwing a good vibe or two my way, I’d sure appreciate it.

* I realized yesterday that some of Sam’s woe could be caused by the introduction of cow’s milk into his diet. So, we took milk away and went back to 100% forumla. On the advice of SamCam, I also have him some probiotics to help his belly get back to normal. Sadly, he threw up all of his dinner last night, but since then has been so much better. Today he was only mildly fussy and has his appetite back. And there’s been a definite decrease in the action taking place downstairs, if you catch my drift. Gerald reminded me of all the trouble we had finding a formula for him, too, and that he spent time on lactose-free stuff because of these same issues. I’ll talk to his pediatrician about it at his one year visit next week and see what she advises. (Please don’t let it be expensive formula for another year. Amen.)

* I bought my pass for BlogHer’11 in San Diego. Will you be there? Would you like to hang out with me because my social awkwardness will make you look sauve and sophisticated? By all means, email me!

* The kids and I met Gerald for lunch today and I was once again blown away by how awesome our kids are. Maddie is so polite and has such wonderful manners and is generally a really awesome kid. Sam is at such a fun age and is such a handsome lovebug that I steal kisses every couple of minutes. For all that they’re a giant pain in my ass, my family is wicked awesome and I’m so lucky to have them.

* Sunday is my seventh anniversary. Holla! My dad and step-mom are keeping the kids for a couple of hours so we can have a real, live date. We’ve had ONE since Sam was born a year ago. ONE. He’s thick in the throes of separation anxiety, but we’re hoping that just a few hours will be ok. We’re staying close to home, so if he loses his shit, we’ll be able to pick them up and spare everyone involved some unnecessary trauma.

Productivty, Pro-Duc-Tiv-Ity*

Yesterday, I found myself getting a little batshit crazy squirrely again, so I decided that what I needed to do were things that were productive but had a very visible result. That way I could really SEE what I had done and could feel good about it and less squirrely. I know! I’m like the Dr. Phil of blogging, right?! Anyhow, so let me share what I did… because that’s what blogging is all about. I share the inane details of my life, you read, comment if you like and then I read the inane details of your life and comment.

First of all, I went to Sprouts and got fruits and veggies to make a metric ass-load of baby food for Sam. I’ve been making his food for about seven months now and I’m honestly getting pretty tired of it. We were doing great until I spent a week in the hospital and Gerald used up all the food I had stashed in the freezer and I’ve never gotten a surplus again. So I feel like I’m making his food all the frickin’ time. Anyhow, I made peaches, pears, butternut squash, zucchini, brown rice and tri-colored pasta (regular, spinach and tomato). I still need to make some chicken, but otherwise we’ve got a fairly good stash now. And lots of little bags of food cubes in the freezer to visually gauge productivity.

I also made Sam some teething biscuits. Not out of some fear that the ones in the store are loaded with chemicals and crap, but because it was cheaper to make them. All I needed that I didn’t already have was wheat germ. I got some and made the biscuits and homemade granola bars with it. Here’s the recipe for the teethers if you’re interested. (I can tell you that Sam gobbled up the one he had, but Maddie and I don’t really like them. They’re bland, but you don’t want to be putting loads of sugar in something for wee ones, right?  Maddie had a good time rolling them into “sneaky snakes,” too, so bonus points for a fun kid activity.)

Wholesome Wheat Cookies

Ingredients:

2/3 cup milk
4 Tbsp butter, melted and cooled
1 Tbsp brown sugar
1 cup plain, untoasted wheat germ
1 cup whole wheat flour, approx.

Directions:
Beat together the milk, butter and sugar. Stir in the wheat germ and enough flour to make a dough.
Knead until smooth and satiny, about 8 to 10 minutes.
Pinch off balls of dough and roll them into sticks about 1/2 in. thick and 4 in. long
Bake on a greased cookie sheet at 350°F for about 45 minutes or until browned and hard.
Makes about 20 depending on the size you make them.

Since we were baking, Maddie and I also made homemade vanilla wafers. I can’t tell you how they turned out because the dough is in my freezer right now. (We’re going to bake them after nap.) But, I can tell you that the dough passed the official Beater Licking Test as administered by my daughter.

I also did two loads of laundry, swept the kitchen and vacuumed the house. I feel really good about it. I’m pleased that Gerald will have a clean(ish) house, fed children, a good dinner and cookies when he gets home from work. I know if I was still working in an office I would like those things waiting for me when I got home.

I also took the time to type up a few short emails to friends I hadn’t chatted with in a while. To let them know I was thinking of them and missing them. I was rewarded with a nice chatty call from Donna, whom I adore. So, I’m also feeling loved by a friend. All in all, I think I’ve combated the squirrelies today. I’m hoping the victory will be enough to help me get over the next case of the squirrelies. Because we all know that there will be a next time.

*sung to the tune of Electricity from School House Rock

Well, that was random.

* I went grocery shopping on Thursday night last week. (I went to WalMart about 8:00 or so. I don’t typically shop then, but I needed things for Maddie’s birthday party on Saturday.) Imagine my surprise when I discovered the store was virtually empty. Score, right? WRONG. It seems that 8:00 in my small town is the middle of the night as far as shopping goes. I cannot tell you how many women I saw shopping IN THEIR PAJAMAS. And slippers! Seriously. There is no hyperbole here, folks. The only time it’s acceptable to shop in your pajamas is if it is truly the middle of the night and you’re at the store to get something for a sick child/spouse. And even then you can take some time to put some damn shoes on. WTF is with people?

* I’m sure you’ve noticed that Maddie’s holding a blanket/sucking her thumb in 85% of the pictures I take of her. She’s a hardcore thumb sucker. She’s developed a wicked case of eczema around her mouth from the constant dampness of her blanket and her bottom teeth are starting to lean into her mouth. Gerald and I decided that when she turned four she was only going to be allowed to have her blanket at nap and bed times. We prepared her for this by talking about all the awesome stuff four year olds get to do and throwing in there that since she’s going to be a Big Kid that her blanket has to live in her bed now. Big Kids do not carry around blankets and suck their thumbs. Amazingly, we got absolutely no push-back on this. She’s been remarkably cool with it. I expected she’d suck her thumb without the blanket but so far she hasn’t done it once. She’s asked to bring her blanket into a living room a few times, but accepts that she can’t when she’s told no. She was miserable after her pediatrician’s appointment yesterday (FOUR SHOTS and one dose of Flu Mist!) so I made her a nest on the couch and let her have her blanket for a little while. She didn’t even try to take advantage of my intense guilt over having to hold her down for her shots.

* We’re going to register Maddie for the Spring season of local soccer. They have a First Kicks program for three and four year olds that teaches them the basics of the game and they play scrimmages against each other at each weekly practice. It lasts six weeks and a parent’s participation is mandatory. Maddie’s going to LOVE it. She’s been asking to play soccer for two years. (We live very close to the town’s soccer fields and she sees the kids playing all the time.) She also wants to go to Ballerina School, so we’re going to look at sending her in the fall. It’s so neat to be able to do this kind of stuff with her now that she’s a KID and not a baby.

* I got a variety pack of k-cups from Amazon that came via FedEx today. I’m overwhelmed by all my choices! I’m making notes on likes and dislikes so that I know what to order in the future.

* I’ve been thinking a lot lately about getting another cat. Here are my notes, thus far:
Pros – I love cats.
I miss a warm, purring cat sharing my pillow at night.
If we get a kitten, he/she will grow up with our kids and likely not be afraid of / hate them with the fire of a thousand suns like our old cat did.
Um, I really, really love cats.

Cons – Litterbox.
Fur everywhere.
Stepping on cold cat barf in the dark when getting up to feed the baby.
In general, cats are Very Unhealthy Animals and will indubitably cost me an arm and a leg in vet bills over the long-term. (Our last two cats had kidney problems, diabetes, and thyroid issues.)

Nevermind. I just talked myself right out of it with that list. Whew.

* I STILL haven’t heard back from my previous Workplace about coming in for another interview. Last I heard, I was still in the running, but they got behind over the holidays. Well, it’s been a month since the holidays and they still haven’t gotten their act together. Do I really want to work for someone who takes this damn long to decide on an interview? Not a final candidate, just an INTERVIEW.

Holiday Spirit

So, what are you listening to that puts you in the Holiday Spirit? I’m looking for some new Christmas music and would love to know what you’re digging.

(I’m loving Harry Connick, Jr, and Barenaked Ladies Christmas albums as always.)

Friday Tidbits

* Health Kick Status – Let’s just get this over with: Operation Exercise is a FAIL. I was doing well until the time change. Now it’s too dark and cold to wog at night. And I tried doing my Wii Fit in the living room, but that only happened once. I’m acknowledging that exercise isn’t important enough to me to find another way to make it work. Therefore, I’ve moved on to watching what I eat instead. Yes, I’m actually dumb enough to have started Weight Watchers the week before Thanksgiving. I was going to put it off but then it’ll be almost Christmas and then I might as well wait until after the holidays and then it’s New Year’s and I’m not so much with the resolutions. I figure now is the best time. While I’m motivated and whatnot. We’ll see how it pans out.

* I’ve been offered the opportunity to stay on as an employee with my company for six more months. This is fantastic news. I’ll be on a different project so I get to learn something new, too.

* Maddie is killing me with the naps. Or lack thereof. She’s adamant that she doesn’t need nap, which is fine. She’s almost four. But, oh, SHE NEEDS ONE. Without a nap, by 4:00 she is a tragic hot mess. Whining and crying and generally channeling her inner Chris Crocker. So now we get to fight about napping, too. Joy.

* I haven’t even begun to Christmas shop. I’m already panicky and anxious about it.

* I really want to make homemade bagels but I’m VERY inexperienced with yeast recipes so I’m wicked intimidated. Have you done it? Easy? Hard? Worth it? HALP.

Gone Living; Be Back Soon

It’s been a while since I’ve posted, hasn’t it? I have three or four half written drafts but never found the time to finish and publish them.

I’m enjoying being present in my life again. I want to stop and tell you all the great stuff that’s going on, but I don’t have the desire to sit and type. I know that’s terrible to say. I whine and moan and bitch to you when things are awful but as soon as they’re good again, I’m nowhere to be found. I’m like that bitch you were friends with in college but really had no idea why you were friends with her because she was only ever around when she was in between boyfriends or fighting with her BFFs.

So, brief synopsis of the last week:

* Maddie stayed with my in-laws for a week. Sam went to Sleep Boot Camp. He sleeps like a champ at night now. Naps are a whole ‘nother story, unfortunately.

* I met Jennie! She is AWESOME! And she introduced me to Kristie, Julie, Natalie, and Danielle. I thought I’d be totally out of place and a complete dork since I was alone and didn’t know anyone, but it wasn’t bad at all. Jennie was very sweet and made sure to introduce to me everyone she knew. I was still a complete dork, but it was somehow ok. I can’t wait to see everyone again.

* We’re getting ready for the Holiday Travel Extravaganza. Maddie, Sam and I are going down to my in-laws on the 21st. Gerald is flying down on the 24th and we’re all driving home together some time after Thanksgiving. Christmas will be a sad time since we’ll be the only members of my extended family that won’t be going home to Cleveland. I am still so very, very bummed about this. Anyhow, we’ll be here for Christmas and then traveling back to the in-laws for the Christmas After-Party.

* I was doing well on my health kick until the time change. Now it’s dark by the time dinner is over, so wogging is out. I actually used my Wii Fit the other night and jogged in my living room. It wasn’t too bad, really. I may do that and some Jillian Michaels nonsense until Spring.

That about catches you up. Not really very exciting when I look at it in black and white. But it feels good to be living again instead of merely existing. Thank you, Eli Lilly, patron saint of mental health.