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False Labor, True Pain
May 3rd, 2010
Yesterday, I awoke with the energy and desire to clean my house. Not everything, but the things I hate to clean the most. I put some laundry in and did five loads throughout the day. Including our and Maddie’s sheets and remade the beds. I swept the kitchen and entry way and cleaned the baseboards. I steam mopped and then used the magic eraser to get whatever gunk was still left in the grout. Then, Maddie “helped” me vacuum the rest of the house. It might not sound like a lot, but first of all, I’m hugely pregnant. Secondly, our kitchen is the largest room in the house and I HATE mopping with the fire of a thousand suns.
Anyhow, I laid down for an hour and a half in the middle of the day, but apparently that wasn’t enough. By dinner time, I was seriously hurting. It felt like the baby was just going to fall right out. Don’t get me wrong, that’d be a great labor, but still, that shit was uncomfortable. By the time Maddie went to bed at 7:30, I was miserable. I took a warm bath hoping that would help. Nope. I took an anti-contraction pill and laid in bed on my left side. I ate a snack and wound up with terrible nausea in addition to the contractions and pressure. I felt like I was going to snap and lose my shit entirely. I didn’t think I could be any more miserable. I got up and sat in my recliner, which helped with the nausea, but not the contractions. An hour or so later when I stopped feeling sick, I went back to bed. I laid there, timing contractions. When they got to four minutes apart I almost told Gerald we were packing up and heading to the hospital. However, over the course of the next three hours, they gradually got further and further apart. Finally, around 12:30, they were so slight that I managed to fall asleep.
All in all, I was miserable and honestly believed I was in labor for five hours and what do I have to show for it? Not a damn thing. How unfair is that shit??? Anyhow, I’ve got my 35 week OB appointment today, so we’ll see what he says. Let’s hope I can make it through the weekend. You know, without wanting to give myself a c-section in the garage with a hacksaw and some Anbesol.
test Filed under complaining, knocked up | Comments (6)6 Responses to “False Labor, True Pain”
This is seriously mean! Five hours of labor pain for nothing?! It’s bad enough that we have to go through labor pain to get the baby, but to go through the labor pain and NOT get the baby? I call bull.
I think I tried to tell you this on twitter, but I’m never sure of how understandable my 140 character tweets are… But this happened to me at the end of both of my pregnancies with disturbing frequency. I went to bed OFTEN (sometimes NIGHTLY) thinking FOR SURE *this* was the night…. only to wake in the morning STILL EFFING PREGNANT.
It was nerve-wracking, frustrating, and depressing. Like Jess said, nothing like labor pains for no gains! (Though, your body is probably making small progress with all those contractions… slowly getting you ready for THE big day.) (Still frustrating though!)
Ugh. I hate false labor.
Not okay. I have a doctor appointment today too and I’m curious to see what he says since this is the first of the “pants off” appointments.
Ah, the “pants off” appointments. The time for dignity is at an end.
You are kind of DISOBEDIENT, aren’t you? What are you doing flying around doing all those chores? Are you not supposed to be TAKING IT EASY? I will make you nachos and s’mores if you will STOP DOING SO MUCH WORK.