All Dressed Up

9 Responses to “The mathematics of parenthood”

1. JMC, on May 27th, 2008 at 5:58 am Said:

   I’ve proven that equation. The proof goes something like this:

   Using the axioms

   (-nap) = (miserable + grouchy)*baby

   and

   NO FUN AT ALL = (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*mom,

   we can rewrite your equation as

   6:15am wake up + six hours in the car + ((miserable + grouchy)*baby) + two hour bedtime delay = (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*mom.

   Now using the axioms

   exhausted * baby = 10 hours (or more) awake time

   and

   (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*baby = (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*mom

   we now have

   exhausted * baby + ((miserable + grouchy)*baby) + = (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*mom.

   which is to say

   (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*baby = (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*mom

   or

   (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*mom = (miserable + grouchy + exhausted)*mom

   Q.E.D.

2. Tessie, on May 27th, 2008 at 7:10 am Said:

   Horrifying.

3. Erica, on May 27th, 2008 at 7:15 am Said:

   JMC - I am totally in love with you right now.

4. JMC, on May 27th, 2008 at 8:24 am Said:

   Erica - HA! Proofs ARE hot, though. *wink*

5. Jess, on May 27th, 2008 at 8:51 am Said:

   Just READING your post made me stop having fun. And reading JMC’s comment made me decide never to have children.

6. Kim, on May 27th, 2008 at 10:14 am Said:

   Days without naps are the longest. I seriously think naptime is the only time I get ANYTHING done.

7. Devan, on May 28th, 2008 at 7:05 am Said:

   poor thing!! Those days suck!

8. Artemisia, on May 28th, 2008 at 1:39 pm Said:

   JMC - proofs?!?! I just broke out in that nervous sweat that only math can trigger. *shudder*

   Sorry for the crappy equation. But! ADORABLE pig tails! And my favorite New Kid was Jordan.

9. MsPurfrock, on May 29th, 2008 at 1:21 pm Said:

   JMC - damn. I cannot even comprehend the effort that went into that comment. My hat is off to you.

   I’m with you on your equation completely. That seems to be our regular one at the moment, and lord if it doesn’t suck. I only had two hours with The Napless One before bedtime tonight and I was totally ready to sell her to gypsies.

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