I heart Soap & Glory

Whilst grocery shopping at Target yesterday, I happened upon an end-cap that filled me with awe and wonder. It was chock-full of girly pink bottles of beauty products. *swoon* I found myself inextricably pulled by my ovaries to the shelves. There, I discovered the love that is Soap & Glory.

Soap & Glory is a beauty product line from the U.K. Foreign and pink, you say? Sign me up! The display was catchy as hell, but even better, the products looked worthwhile, too.

I picked up a bottle of “Clean on Me” body wash, “The Scrub of Your Life,” and “Great Shakes” hand cream. (Yes, you will balk at the prices and wonder if they’re worth it. Yes. Yes, they are.) The body wash is rich and lather-y and it smells nice without being overpowering. It’s also moisturizing so I didn’t squeak like a Tupperware bowl when I was done with my shower.

The scrub is fantastic. Those little bumps on the back of my arms? Gone after one use. My scaly shins? Smooth and silky. There was no need for body lotion at all. However, I did slather on the hand cream. Because it is wonderful. Rich and not at all greasy. A hard combination to come by, trust me. My hands are SUPER dry and this stuff made them feel lady-like and not all lumberjack manly.

Next time you’re wandering aimlessly around Target as you kill time running an “errand” with your kid, stop by the beauty section and check out Soap & Glory. And if you’ve got a spare $10, take some home with you. Go on, treat yourself a little.

On the front lines

Maddie’s going through a rough time. She’s hit several milestones in a short amount of time and it’s caused quite a disruption in her sleep pattern. For the last few days, she’s refused to nap. Can you imagine the hell that is an eight month old without any naps? No, you cannot. Unless you’ve experienced it for yourself, that is.

So tonight, I did the unthinkable. I gave my daughter Benadryl so that she’d go to sleep. On one hand, I felt terrible. I drugged my child. Doesn’t that make me a horrible mother? On the other hand, I did what I felt I needed to do to help her. She was miserable and overtired and didn’t know how to turn herself off.

Why can’t they make baby Ambien?

Oh Dear God, Kill Me Now

Maddie has started screaming as a form of communication. She screams when she’s happy and excited and when she’s pissed. Also when she’s, well, awake. This is not crying and screaming. This is just screaming. Shrill enough to make your ears bleed and loud enough to peel the paint off the walls.

Today, it got so bad that I had to put in the ear plugs that I use at night to drown out my husband’s dog’s snoring. Just so I could be in the same room with her without the words “wood chipper” repeating in my head over and over.

I’ve tried to do some “research” online to see how to make it stop right the fuck now deal with it, but all I can find is the advice to use “positive reinforcement.” I am no good at positive reinforcement. When she’s not screaming at me, I’m not thinking about lavishing her with extra attention and love. Hell, I’m probably already playing with her. And when she is screaming, I cannot ignore it and wait until she stops. This is impossible to ignore. The United States Armed Forces need to look into using it for war-time purposes.

While we were playing together, she started to scream at me. I stopped smiling and clapping and dropped my hands and made what I hope was a sad face. It was probably more like an “I’m going to kill you if you don’t shut up” face, but hey, I tried. I did this over and over and IT HAD NO EFFECT ON HER. She just continued to scream. So I got up and walked out of the room. The screaming changed to pissed, but that was all that changed. Finally, I decided she needed some quiet time in her crib. We all needed some quiet time. Within 10 minutes, she was asleep.

All in all, it was the longest and worst day of parenting I’ve had yet. Please tell me it gets better. Tell me that the screaming is just a short-lived phase and it will stop. Lie, if you have to.

Ink

I have tattoos. Several of them, in fact. Not enough to make me look like a biker or a circus performer, but more than three.

I’ve been seriously considering getting a Maddie-inspired tattoo. I’d like to commemorate my transition to motherhood with a permanent reminder of my daughter. The trouble is, I can’t think of what to get or where to put it. Currently, all my tattoos are easily covered by clothing. No one has to know that I have any at all, unless I choose to let them be seen. In professional settings, I don’t feel like I stick out or look inappropriate. I like that. I’m sort of running out of places to put a tattoo that can 1. be covered easily and 2. also be shown without indecency. I don’t want to blush when I show someone my Maddie tat!

So, what are your thought on the matter? Do you have any tattoos? Would you get a tattoo honoring your child(ren)? Do you already have one? If so, what is it or what would it be? I’m not going to steal your idea or get a matching tattoo, I promise. I’m just hoping something you say will spark an idea for my own ink.

Zen and the Art of Working From Home

Ok, I don’t know shit about Zen, but I’ve got the working part down pat.

I don’t know if this plan would work for all types of wahm jobs, but it works well for my situation. I need to be available to work some during normal business hours, but there’s a lot I can do after hours and on the weekends.

On a typical day, Maddie’s up between 7:00 and 7:30 and then down for a nap between 9:00 and 10:00. As soon as she’s in bed, I take a shower and get dressed. Then, I work until she gets up. We play and run whatever errands we need to take care of and then she’s usually ready for a nap again around 2:00. I work until she gets up or Gerald gets home, whichever happens first. Then, it’s time to make dinner. After dinner, we play for about an hour and around 7:00, she gets a bath and goes to bed. I check on the work load and if necessary, I work some more. If things are ok, then I watch TV or read. I’m usually in bed by 10:00. Luckily, my schedule is my own. If something comes up and I have to move it around, I do.

I don’t work on Friday evenings or Saturdays. I do get in there on Sunday evening and take care of as much as possible so that Monday morning’s a little easier on the folks I work with.

My situation is unique in that I was prepared to retire. Gerald and I had already decided that whatever sacrifices we had to make were worth it. I went into this whole thing with the mindset that Maddie was my number one priority. If the working from home thing was interfering with that at all, then I was going back to “retired.” This really cuts down on the work related stress level. I just don’t stress about work. I do as much as I can, and that’s it. Of course, I do my best and try to get as much work done as a I can, but it’s not my number one priority.

If you’re looking for an emotional response, I can tell you that I’ve honestly never been happier in my life. I adore being home with Maddie every day. I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world.

WW Week Three

I lost three pounds last week, for a total of nine. Pretty damn good, if I do say so myself….. and I do : )

I’ll be back later today to answer Jana and Tessie on the subject of “Making Time For Work With A Clingy Child.” The weather is GORGEOUS here today, so Maddie and I are going out to take advantage of it because it won’t be back for another two months.

30 day review

I’ve been home nearly a month, now. I figure it’s time for a progress report.

Surprisingly, staying at home is a lot like being at work. There are days that I accomplish much and Maddie is happy and well-rested. On these days, I want to pump my fist in the air and shout, “Hell yeah! I am the best sahm EVER!!”

Then there are the other days. On the other days, I am weary, the house is a mess and Maddie is driving me bat shit crazy a handful. These are the days that I’m thankful just to be able to take a shower. I cannot imagine making it through the day with both of us alive, the house still standing, or any semblance of work done. It’s all I can do to count the minutes until Gerald gets home. Although, him being home doesn’t really change anything. When he gets home, he has to continue working. Sure, he helps out when I need him to, but the bulk of the responsibilities for Maddie and dinner fall to me. But once he’s home, I begin to count the minutes until the baby’s bedtime. I suppose I break it up because waiting for 7:00 to roll around is just too damn long. This way, I only have to make it until 3:30. And then it’s a hop, skip, and a jump to 7:00.

This all being said, I wouldn’t change it for the world. Even if they offered me double my old salary, I wouldn’t go back. I love being sahm/wahm mom. Even on those terrible days, I know that I’ve accomplished something. I’ve given Maddie one more day with a loving, devoted mother. Another day that she will hopefully grow to appreciate.

I’ve also learned something surprising about myself. I’m not at all suffering for the lack of adult company. Gerald and I talk via IM and I work every day. So, I guess just that little bit of adult interaction keeps me satisfied. I also don’t go stir crazy nearly as often as I thought I would. And I still get out by myself. I go grocery shopping, to WW meetings and even shopping by myself just about every week. I try to wait until Maddie’s in bed to give Gerald a break, but he’s wonderful about keeping her when she’s up, too. He never seems to mind me getting some time to myself. I know I’m lucky in that regard. I’ve heard horror stories of other fathers who consider the children the sole responsibility of the sahm. Yes, Maddie’s mainly my responsibility, but Gerald parents her, too. It took the two of us to make her and it takes the two of us to raise her.

I know I’m in for rough weather as she gets older. She is already showing signs of being a willful child. But, oh, she is such a good girl. Loving and fun and smart as a whip. I know all parents think their kid is the best and brightest, so you’re writing me off right about now. But I’m honestly surprised at how good she is. There are times that I brace myself for a meltdown because it seems like she should have a meltdown because that’s what kids do, and she will just sail right through with a smile on her face. This weekend, we took her out to eat for the first time in months, and she sat in the restaurant highchair for the first time. I was prepared for crying, throwing things, screaming… all manner of embarrassing things. I kept telling myself that we would just leave if it got bad. As if! Maddie was a dream. She was interested in what was going on around her, she played with us and behaved perfectly. I was so proud. The next day, I took her grocery shopping with me. She sat in the cart, like a big girl, for the first time. Again, I prepared for the worst. Imagining having to leave my half-full cart somewhere in the store and rushing out the door with a screaming baby. Nope. She rode along, playing with the toys I provided and reached up for hugs and kisses when she needed reassurance. I know this won’t be the case every time we go out, but still, I’m proud. She is turning out to be such a good girl. And who the hell ever would have seen that coming?

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

First of all, I’d like to thank you all for your advice on the bumper situation. I decided to take MB’s advice on weaving the bumper through the slats. It worked like a charm, and best of all, I didn’t have to thread a needle or spend any money. Thanks a million, MB!

Swistle was also kind enough to send me a link for a Jumperoo on sale at Amazon. I got it for $50 and free shipping. If it’s not a hit, well then I’ve got lots of friends with new babies that I can give it to. Thanks to you, too Dear Swistle.

Maddie’s cutting her second tooth already. Poor lamb. She just can’t catch a break.

Oh, and the best news? She started calling me “Mama” yesterday. Hopefully it will last this time.

Two posts! In one day!

I need to ask the moms out there about crib bumpers. Here’s our situation: Maddie has a regular crib bumper. It ties on the top, but not the bottom, so it’s not really secure on the crib. She’s tearing it up something fierce lately. I’ve mentioned previously, i.e., earlier today, that she’s very playful in her crib. There aren’t any toys whatsoever in there, so her bumper has become her plaything. I don’t have the “safe and warm and fuzzy” feeling about it. A couple of weeks ago, I actually found her with her head under the bumper as she slept.

I’ve tried taking it off, but that same night, she got her arm caught in the slats and hurt herself. What else can I do? Should I get one of those breathable mesh bumpers? Leave the one she has on? Take it off and let her learn not to stick limbs through the slats? Help!

Also, do any of you have a jumperoo for your child? Maddie has really taken to bouncing lately, and I’m thinking about getting her one. Before I spend $70 -$80, I’d like to know what you think/your kids think of yours.

Thank you in advance for your advice! I’m a hopeless mess without you, you know.

Tender Moments

This morning, after finishing her bottle, Maddie laid her head on my shoulder and gazed up at me. She reached out her chubby, little hand and caressed my cheek. She gifted me with a beautiful smile and sweetly said, “Dada.”

About 90% of the time, Maddie naps in her swing. This is because she’s too rambunctious in her crib. She spends half an hour playing and by then, the urge to nap has subsided. The swing beats rocks her into submission, so it’s a win for us. However, lately she’s been dropping her blankie out of the swing and then screaming bloody murder for me to come and pick it up. Today, I declared, “If you drop this one more time, I’m going to staple it to your beautiful little forehead.” There’s nothing quite like a mother’s love, is there?

Do you think it’s a coincidence that I’ve developed an eye twitch since I started staying home with her?