Lucky
I’m sure this post will come back to bite me in the ass by angering the gods and bringing the wrath of toddlerhood down upon me, but I’ve decided to chance it and write it anyway.
I really like my kid. Notice I didn’t say that I loved my kid (which of course, I do). I said I like her. She’s fun to hang around. She’s very curious and observant. She’s pretty laid back and rarely has a fits anymore. She’s got an infectious laugh and she’s the most smoochable thing I know. I love to spend my time playing with her and showing her new things. For instance, tonight, she had peas for the first time. Actually, it was the first time she’d ever had a green vegetable. She loves them. She ate them with the veracity of a great white. She demanded that I feed them to her at her pace or she’d start clawing at the bowl and spoon to get them her damn self.
I feel so lucky to have her. I had a terrible pregnancy, an even worse birth experience and a heinous postpartum period. But, I got the best kid EVER out of it all. Every single minute of worry, sleeplessness and pain was worth it. I’m never doing it again, but it was worth it.
Now, I know that as she gets older and more independent, there will times when she tries my patience. And let’s be honest, there will be times when I don’t like her…. she will be a teenage girl after all. But I’m sure that we’ll get through those rough times and end up liking each other again. In fact, I’m sorta betting on it.
Filed under: uncategorized on June 29th, 2007
OK the terrible two’s …what worked for me was remove them from the situation then leave them alone. Miraculously it passes! This plan does not work in a long line at the supermarket though. Tough it out…it builds character.
I too realized early on I hit the jackpot with my kid. I too decided not to try to replicate perfection!
She’ll be a great teenager…I know mine as been. Ok so mine’s a boy and your’s is a girl. Downside, she’ll giggle and squeal a lot. But I bet that will be the worst of it!
Just remember this bit of sage advice…”ask a teenager while they still know everything!”
Huggs…you’re a great mom!
Theresa
My boy is 19, my girl is 14 and strangely enough I like them both a great deal. I do find that I like my daughter more when it is just she and I. When her friends are around I like her less. And while it it’s absolutely none of my business — siblings are wonderful!!
Hugs,
Elis
Our kids have become our friends as you know. However, there was a time when my heart was broken as they both had to cut the apron strings in their own way. It hurt. But we came through it and now it’s awesome!
Here’s a story for you about how I handled Lucy at the store when she was two-ish and decided to throw a tantrum in the store. It was obviously meant to test me; she wanted some crackers off the shelf so I obliged her and put them in the cart. She wanted to open them and I said, “No no, sweetie, you’ll have to wait until we get home.
Huge screaming fit. I stared at her for a moment, wondering what on earth to do. If I hadn’t filled up my cart with so much stuff, I would have yanked her up out of the cart-seat and we’d have gone straight home. I’m pretty sure she knew I didn’t want to do that, as she just kept screaming but with that look on her face like, ‘Got ya now!’.
So I did yank her up and marched her out to our van. I put her in her car seat and strapped her in and said, “I’ll leave you here and go shopping without you since you can’t behave”.
Well, of course I didn’t *really* leave her there but she didn’t know that, instead of going back in the store, I hid behind a column maybe 5 feet or so away where she couldn’t see me but I could still see her. She screamed furiously in her car seat for maybe 30 more seconds, then her little head drooped and she subsided into little hiccups and whimpers and then stopped.
After all, if I wasn’t around to watch all her dramatics, what was the point; it’s tiring, heh.
I walked back to the van and opened the door. “Do you want to be a big girl and behave now?” She nodded yes and reached for me. I said, okay, but you can’t throw a tantrum like that anymore, okay, Lucy?” She nodded and I hugged her tight, kissed her and told her she was a good girl.
She never gave me a problem after that in stores or restaurants. All I had to say was, “Would you like to sit in the car while we/I eat/shop/whatever?” She’d always shake her head “no” and stop throwing a fit.
Bonus; years later, when her brother tried the same thing in the store at around the same age, I told him the same thing; that if he couldn’t behave, fine, then Lucy and I would shop/whatever while he sat in the car. He obviously didn’t believe me so I said, “ask your sister”. He looked at her and she nodded and said, “Yes, Ray; it’s true! Mommy did that with me.” Ray’s eyes got wide and he never did it after that either.
At home, same thing. If they wanted to hang out with us or when we had people over, fine as long as they were pleasant company. But if they started the tantrum stuff, about anything, they were banished to their rooms until they wanted to behave.
One of my few shining successes in parenting; I didn’t always get success, lol! ;-P
I suppose to some parents, my might be considered cruel today, maybe. I don’t know, I see a lot of what I think is very permissive parenting these days; kids allowed to yell and scream and throw things, in public and when we visit, and the parents say, “Now don’t do that Suzy, that’s not nice Jimmy” but they don’t DO anything about it! And the kids know it so they just keep doing it. Drives me nuts.
And then when they finally DO step up and force them to behave, then the kid really freaks out because it’s so rare. Just odd, the whole thing. I don’t get it; we’re social creatures and we need to treat our kids to be socially well-rounded, right?
It’s a pain in the ass when they are not.